The very first edition of I Am Free: Healing Stories of Surviving Toxic Relationships With Narcissists and Sociopaths will be available to purchase on April 30, 2016 or May 1, 2016, depending where you live in the world. I will be posting a link to where you can purchase the book (tomorrow) on my public Facebook Forum page Narcissistic Abuse And Toxic Relationships. Find out some interesting facts about the book and how you can personally get involved and join the campaign to help raise awareness about narcissistic abuse. Continue reading Find Out How To Get Your Copy of “I Am Free” And Help Spread Awareness About Narcissistic Abuse
I bet you have asked yourself this question at least a hundred times, “why is it so hard to get over the narcissist in my life?” It probably doesn’t make much sense to you why you’re struggling so hard to move on from someone whose rap sheet of wrongdoings toward you is a mile long. It should be easy to let go of someone who has caused you so much pain… right? Well, not really when you understand the interplay of factors that contribute to the concept of cognitive dissonance.
It’s no secret that today’s society has grown increasingly more health conscious than ever before. Healthier alternatives are springing up in the most unexpected places like fast food restaurants of all things. And caloric counts displayed next to menu items has almost become the rule instead of the exception. Health conscious people are opting for organic over processed foods. Gluten free substitutes. Wraps in place of bread. Alkaline water instead of tap water. Packing lunches for work in lieu of eating out, and yet the vast majority of health conscious people fail to consider that the stress caused from toxic relationships, whether with spouses, partners, family, friends and even co-workers, can be just as damaging to their health and well-being as the foods they’ve so resolutely eliminated from their daily diets.
You find yourself wondering what happened to the once picture-perfect relationship you had and why despite trying everything imaginable, the two of you can’t seem to get that loving feeling back. You and your partner have started to live more separate lives and those cute little yellow sticky love notes they used to leave you on the bathroom counter or on your car windshield seem like a distant memory. You start to realize you’re settling and kidding yourself that there is any hope of a future for the two of you, at least not a happy one, but even when faced with the reality that your relationship is dying a slow death, you still stay.
As the holiday season draws near, many of us get into the “holiday spirit” with anticipation. The end of the year brings a hectic pace with it as people celebrate joyous occasions like Thanksgiving with loved ones, then quickly start planning and preparing for the festivities of Christmas, Hanukkah or Kwanzaa, topped off by ringing in the New Year on New Year’s Eve.
A very powerful article by Malignnarc written from the perspective of the narcissist. Please do not read if you feel you might be triggered.
You fell in love with an illusion. You fell hard and deep for something which never existed. The golden days that we created together were the twisted reflections of my manipulative hold over you. I know how anxious you were to try to recover the golden period. You poured your beautiful heart into securing the impossible. I know that my silences, my verbal violence, the cheating and the lies, my perfidious control of you was brutal, malicious and devastating. I understand that the whole avalanche of manipulative techniques I applied to you, in savage wave after insidious wave crushed your self-esteem, mauled your sanity and shattered your world. This brutality was nothing compared to the aftermath.
For now you have slipped away from my tight, choking grip. I know however that you sit looking from the window where you used to watch for me strolling up the driveway, a bouquet…
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Why do narcissists seem to pick the worst possible times to discard their partners? Are they really that cold-blooded that they not only break-up with you, but also plan to do it at a time that would add insult to injury? What would motivate a narcissist to hurt someone they professed to love so much in such a heartless and brutal manner?
I have heard many stories of narcissists dumping their partners right before a major holiday, or on their partner’s birthday, or after their partner shared something very personal. I’ve also heard of narcissists ending relationships right before a special planned event, or when their partner was down on their luck, grieving the loss of a loved one or even diagnosed with a serious illness. The list of heartless, cold and calculating ways that narcissists end relationships continues on and on.
It is not your imagination. Indeed, it is true that the narcissist will purposely plan the timing of their breakups to occur during times when distress or vulnerability is extremely high in your life.
Register now for this free Surviving Narcissistic Abuse Virtual Summit. It will be informative and interactive. For more details and information about how to register, go to http://narcdiaries.com
Years ago when I started my career as Psychotherapist, a seasoned colleague gave me perhaps the best piece of professional advice I had ever received. She told me, “if you don’t want to burn out in this field, never work harder on solving your client’s problems than they do”.
This wonderful morsel of advice saved me from the all to common burn out of a career that so many mental health professionals who don’t exercise good boundaries often experience.
And it can save you too.
By refusing to work harder than your partner on solving the problems in your relationship, you can weed out the manipulators, controllers and users and avoid being taken advantage of and carrying all the emotional weight in the relationship.
There is no such thing as a non-hypocritical narcopath. You are more likely to cross paths with a Chupacabra or Big Foot than you are to find a narcopath who isn’t a hypocrite. Narcopaths are hypocrisy personified. It is their middle name. What they say and do in public is the direct opposite of what they say and do behind the scenes. Hypocrisy is to the narcopath as venom is to a rattlesnake. They go hand in hand like Satan and Hell.